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well this only took 18 hours but at least there’s an explosion at the end

Essays on the Original in GRUPPE Issue 7

By @nelejackson @grantedwardtyler @linnearm

Essays on the Original in GRUPPE Issue 7

By @nelejackson @grantedwardtyler @linnearm

Essays on the Original in GRUPPE Issue 7

By @nelejackson @grantedwardtyler @linnearm

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

how to get your bjj blue belt in JUST five years

i recently got mine from @sacchimartino so i wanted to share some tips and tricks on how to get there as fast as me. also some super rare footage from before my first ever fight (last slide).

make sure to:

1. pretend you’re not really training jiu jitsu at all (pick a sport where you never find any opponents and do bjj „on the side“)
2. switch gyms regularly so no coach can remember your face
3. get horribly injured a couple times (gets easier as you get older)
4. don’t ever train in the gi - this one’s a no brainer and makes sure every brazilian instantly loses respect. sweater and socks on the mat are imperative
5. rely on raw strength in every roll so you never have to learn any technique

should have posted this for april fool‘s but i forgot. pretending to be a 70s soccer player for@magliano.insta x @veja. makes me wanna work on my calves.

@jacksonbowley @elisa_voto @clarambra @jenniferlecorre @alanantoineh @ciccone_burrito @letitgomgmt @letitgo.world

should have posted this for april fool‘s but i forgot. pretending to be a 70s soccer player for@magliano.insta x @veja. makes me wanna work on my calves.

@jacksonbowley @elisa_voto @clarambra @jenniferlecorre @alanantoineh @ciccone_burrito @letitgomgmt @letitgo.world

should have posted this for april fool‘s but i forgot. pretending to be a 70s soccer player for@magliano.insta x @veja. makes me wanna work on my calves.

@jacksonbowley @elisa_voto @clarambra @jenniferlecorre @alanantoineh @ciccone_burrito @letitgomgmt @letitgo.world

should have posted this for april fool‘s but i forgot. pretending to be a 70s soccer player for@magliano.insta x @veja. makes me wanna work on my calves.

@jacksonbowley @elisa_voto @clarambra @jenniferlecorre @alanantoineh @ciccone_burrito @letitgomgmt @letitgo.world

should have posted this for april fool‘s but i forgot. pretending to be a 70s soccer player for@magliano.insta x @veja. makes me wanna work on my calves.

@jacksonbowley @elisa_voto @clarambra @jenniferlecorre @alanantoineh @ciccone_burrito @letitgomgmt @letitgo.world

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

>> last year in fights

hardly a worthwhile pursuit but i’m trying to get better at posting - so here’s my 2025 recap in february 2026 as opposed to, like, october. despite stupid demanding physio school sucking my energy like one of those battery coffin things in the matrix i was able to compete 4 times last year, which i can force myself to still be proud of if i step off the hedonic treadmill for just a second. even more importantly, i finally found a gym that suits me in @sayyato_mma_gym - big deal. i got to enjoy the support of and friendship of many new (and old) coaches and training partners in @sacchimartino @_bridgey @kamibarzini @mmathias030 @jaqui.hardcore who’ve taught me some sick moves and occasionally held my hand when i was being a big overwhelmed baby. the biggest win of all is that i made it through this year extremely injury-free, except for an embarassing little hexenschuss from overestimating my deadlift capacity in december.

so here goes - pics in order of sickness, fights in chronological order:

1. first grappling superfight + first comp in a long time at groundhug day @fenrizgym with a tough win against an experienced opponent (photos by @aci46 @gracieacademyberlin)
2. k1 sparring match at @takedowncombat_fightpromotion that made me realize I love grappling
3. a glorious mma debut with a first round submission at @chinkilla.co ultimate badass 3 (photos by @roschke)
4. a lackluster performance at @esqape.de grappling tournament with a net-zero outcome (with great photos by @luc_.y_ )

on to 2026.

last year for @fluid.mag shot by @t.h.hauser

from a folder of stunning professional photos of myself that i never post until i do. there’s something really really cringe to drafting a post about yourself that i can only muster the fortitude to overcome about once a year. but for the sake of life archival and job opportunities - if you do me right i’m not just a sweaty face.

last year for @fluid.mag shot by @t.h.hauser

from a folder of stunning professional photos of myself that i never post until i do. there’s something really really cringe to drafting a post about yourself that i can only muster the fortitude to overcome about once a year. but for the sake of life archival and job opportunities - if you do me right i’m not just a sweaty face.

Walk-Out of the Night 🧨

If we had a trophy for the best walk-out of Ultimate Badass 3, it would go to Nele „The Problem“ Jackson of team @sayyato_mma_gym 😎

hello. i keep forgetting i exist so i keep forgetting to make posts affirming my existence. also i didn’t enjoy being online very much this last year with everything that was going on in the world. but now that terrible has become the status quo i guess i will venture on the occasional ego trip again. there are some professionally handsome shots of me from the past few months that i thought i’d share before they become too historic. there’s also some life updates for those invested in my dharma. 2024 was a bad year for humankind but a pretty good year for me:

1. i turned 30, the age i was supposed to be all along
2. i went back to school to become a physiotherapist - following my celestial path predestined by Chiron (breaking my body so i can learn to heal others)
3. i moved in with my life partner, lol (love of life), sole maid. it‘s been good.

i’m still training and all (“more intelligently”, some say; “much less”, others) and doing a bit of writing on the side. sometimes, for reasons i will never fully grasp but have learned to gratefully accept, people want to take photos of my face and body. also, at some point in the future, i reckon i’ll start offering community physio + massage sessions for practice. keep in touch for that. anyway, here’s me wearing @balenciaga for @fazquarterly last fall.

shot by @roman_goebel with @aliandaniko @alex.bohn @maria.leutner @attila.kenyeres @ischrak_nitschke @marcusviniciusdq @lisadymph @reneskw @andreasmusculus @nelejackson @balenciaga @stella.raschke @nittygritty.berlin @cprintberlin @jelkavonlangen

Consider this my official merch line.
Available via shirtbangerz.com / @shirtbangerz 👉

Many of you know me as an athlete, model, anti-authenticity activist, “the voice of a generation” (your words), mother of two, etc. But did you know I’m also the CEO/CTO of two Forbes 500 companies? Today I want to talk about one of them.
When my husband and I started Shirt Bangerz in a World War II bunker 6 months ago, we could never in a million years have predicted its meteoric rise. A German and a Canadian, equipped with nothing but a website, a drop-shipping supplier, and a bleeding heart… who knew where it would land us? Yes, we knew our ideas were good. But we were too humble to admit HOW good they actually were.
A shirt company? In 2023? I know what you’re thinking. But let’s just say that over at Shirt Bangerz, we do things a liiiiittle differently. Let’s just say: PREPARE TO SMILE.
Yesterday we took our new offices in a little corner of the Reichstag glass dome in Berlin. What a way to start the year! We truly couldn’t be more blessed… I want to thank you all for the wild ride it’s been so far. Here’s to many more years of shirts 🥂👕

@rrrbenjackson

Consider this my official merch line.
Available via shirtbangerz.com / @shirtbangerz 👉

Many of you know me as an athlete, model, anti-authenticity activist, “the voice of a generation” (your words), mother of two, etc. But did you know I’m also the CEO/CTO of two Forbes 500 companies? Today I want to talk about one of them.
When my husband and I started Shirt Bangerz in a World War II bunker 6 months ago, we could never in a million years have predicted its meteoric rise. A German and a Canadian, equipped with nothing but a website, a drop-shipping supplier, and a bleeding heart… who knew where it would land us? Yes, we knew our ideas were good. But we were too humble to admit HOW good they actually were.
A shirt company? In 2023? I know what you’re thinking. But let’s just say that over at Shirt Bangerz, we do things a liiiiittle differently. Let’s just say: PREPARE TO SMILE.
Yesterday we took our new offices in a little corner of the Reichstag glass dome in Berlin. What a way to start the year! We truly couldn’t be more blessed… I want to thank you all for the wild ride it’s been so far. Here’s to many more years of shirts 🥂👕

@rrrbenjackson

Consider this my official merch line.
Available via shirtbangerz.com / @shirtbangerz 👉

Many of you know me as an athlete, model, anti-authenticity activist, “the voice of a generation” (your words), mother of two, etc. But did you know I’m also the CEO/CTO of two Forbes 500 companies? Today I want to talk about one of them.
When my husband and I started Shirt Bangerz in a World War II bunker 6 months ago, we could never in a million years have predicted its meteoric rise. A German and a Canadian, equipped with nothing but a website, a drop-shipping supplier, and a bleeding heart… who knew where it would land us? Yes, we knew our ideas were good. But we were too humble to admit HOW good they actually were.
A shirt company? In 2023? I know what you’re thinking. But let’s just say that over at Shirt Bangerz, we do things a liiiiittle differently. Let’s just say: PREPARE TO SMILE.
Yesterday we took our new offices in a little corner of the Reichstag glass dome in Berlin. What a way to start the year! We truly couldn’t be more blessed… I want to thank you all for the wild ride it’s been so far. Here’s to many more years of shirts 🥂👕

@rrrbenjackson

Consider this my official merch line.
Available via shirtbangerz.com / @shirtbangerz 👉

Many of you know me as an athlete, model, anti-authenticity activist, “the voice of a generation” (your words), mother of two, etc. But did you know I’m also the CEO/CTO of two Forbes 500 companies? Today I want to talk about one of them.
When my husband and I started Shirt Bangerz in a World War II bunker 6 months ago, we could never in a million years have predicted its meteoric rise. A German and a Canadian, equipped with nothing but a website, a drop-shipping supplier, and a bleeding heart… who knew where it would land us? Yes, we knew our ideas were good. But we were too humble to admit HOW good they actually were.
A shirt company? In 2023? I know what you’re thinking. But let’s just say that over at Shirt Bangerz, we do things a liiiiittle differently. Let’s just say: PREPARE TO SMILE.
Yesterday we took our new offices in a little corner of the Reichstag glass dome in Berlin. What a way to start the year! We truly couldn’t be more blessed… I want to thank you all for the wild ride it’s been so far. Here’s to many more years of shirts 🥂👕

@rrrbenjackson

Consider this my official merch line.
Available via shirtbangerz.com / @shirtbangerz 👉

Many of you know me as an athlete, model, anti-authenticity activist, “the voice of a generation” (your words), mother of two, etc. But did you know I’m also the CEO/CTO of two Forbes 500 companies? Today I want to talk about one of them.
When my husband and I started Shirt Bangerz in a World War II bunker 6 months ago, we could never in a million years have predicted its meteoric rise. A German and a Canadian, equipped with nothing but a website, a drop-shipping supplier, and a bleeding heart… who knew where it would land us? Yes, we knew our ideas were good. But we were too humble to admit HOW good they actually were.
A shirt company? In 2023? I know what you’re thinking. But let’s just say that over at Shirt Bangerz, we do things a liiiiittle differently. Let’s just say: PREPARE TO SMILE.
Yesterday we took our new offices in a little corner of the Reichstag glass dome in Berlin. What a way to start the year! We truly couldn’t be more blessed… I want to thank you all for the wild ride it’s been so far. Here’s to many more years of shirts 🥂👕

@rrrbenjackson

Consider this my official merch line.
Available via shirtbangerz.com / @shirtbangerz 👉

Many of you know me as an athlete, model, anti-authenticity activist, “the voice of a generation” (your words), mother of two, etc. But did you know I’m also the CEO/CTO of two Forbes 500 companies? Today I want to talk about one of them.
When my husband and I started Shirt Bangerz in a World War II bunker 6 months ago, we could never in a million years have predicted its meteoric rise. A German and a Canadian, equipped with nothing but a website, a drop-shipping supplier, and a bleeding heart… who knew where it would land us? Yes, we knew our ideas were good. But we were too humble to admit HOW good they actually were.
A shirt company? In 2023? I know what you’re thinking. But let’s just say that over at Shirt Bangerz, we do things a liiiiittle differently. Let’s just say: PREPARE TO SMILE.
Yesterday we took our new offices in a little corner of the Reichstag glass dome in Berlin. What a way to start the year! We truly couldn’t be more blessed… I want to thank you all for the wild ride it’s been so far. Here’s to many more years of shirts 🥂👕

@rrrbenjackson

i’ve done worse

@balenciaga SS23

Look 8
hair by @garygillhair done by @attila.kenyeres
makeup by @ingegrognard et al
casted by @leopolda.duchemin @laurtanz
repped by @girlmgmt
impressed by
@demna @niklas.bildstein.zaar mrt4000 @thyagosainte & so on and so on

#balenciaga #ss23

i’ve done worse

@balenciaga SS23

Look 8
hair by @garygillhair done by @attila.kenyeres
makeup by @ingegrognard et al
casted by @leopolda.duchemin @laurtanz
repped by @girlmgmt
impressed by
@demna @niklas.bildstein.zaar mrt4000 @thyagosainte & so on and so on

#balenciaga #ss23

i’ve done worse

@balenciaga SS23

Look 8
hair by @garygillhair done by @attila.kenyeres
makeup by @ingegrognard et al
casted by @leopolda.duchemin @laurtanz
repped by @girlmgmt
impressed by
@demna @niklas.bildstein.zaar mrt4000 @thyagosainte & so on and so on

#balenciaga #ss23

i’ve done worse

@balenciaga SS23

Look 8
hair by @garygillhair done by @attila.kenyeres
makeup by @ingegrognard et al
casted by @leopolda.duchemin @laurtanz
repped by @girlmgmt
impressed by
@demna @niklas.bildstein.zaar mrt4000 @thyagosainte & so on and so on

#balenciaga #ss23

i’ve done worse

@balenciaga SS23

Look 8
hair by @garygillhair done by @attila.kenyeres
makeup by @ingegrognard et al
casted by @leopolda.duchemin @laurtanz
repped by @girlmgmt
impressed by
@demna @niklas.bildstein.zaar mrt4000 @thyagosainte & so on and so on

#balenciaga #ss23

i’ve done worse

@balenciaga SS23

Look 8
hair by @garygillhair done by @attila.kenyeres
makeup by @ingegrognard et al
casted by @leopolda.duchemin @laurtanz
repped by @girlmgmt
impressed by
@demna @niklas.bildstein.zaar mrt4000 @thyagosainte & so on and so on

#balenciaga #ss23

EARS UP SISTERS & SUCKERS. in 2 weeks i’ll be stepping into the octagon for my MMA debut at @gmcolympix. this is officially my 4th attempt at a fi(r)st fight, and i am DYING to get in that cage. am i nervous? of course. nervous for my opponent 😔 true story: she called the promoter to ask if i’m ‘really’ a woman. sorry babes, i am. and i get beat up by guys 6 times a week so i can bury little girl dreams 😪 just kidding!! or am i???? the fact is, i’ve worked harder on this than on literally anything else, ever. the fact is, i meditate like 3 hours a day. the fact is, i’ve never hit anyone with my full power. so let’s see how that goes. plus, how much harder can it be to fight some other woman than the creeping realization that nothing in this universe can be truly known? we’ll find out on aug 20.

photo by @roberthamacher
fists by @spitfiregym_berlin

EARS UP SISTERS & SUCKERS. in 2 weeks i’ll be stepping into the octagon for my MMA debut at @gmcolympix. this is officially my 4th attempt at a fi(r)st fight, and i am DYING to get in that cage. am i nervous? of course. nervous for my opponent 😔 true story: she called the promoter to ask if i’m ‘really’ a woman. sorry babes, i am. and i get beat up by guys 6 times a week so i can bury little girl dreams 😪 just kidding!! or am i???? the fact is, i’ve worked harder on this than on literally anything else, ever. the fact is, i meditate like 3 hours a day. the fact is, i’ve never hit anyone with my full power. so let’s see how that goes. plus, how much harder can it be to fight some other woman than the creeping realization that nothing in this universe can be truly known? we’ll find out on aug 20.

photo by @roberthamacher
fists by @spitfiregym_berlin

EARS UP SISTERS & SUCKERS. in 2 weeks i’ll be stepping into the octagon for my MMA debut at @gmcolympix. this is officially my 4th attempt at a fi(r)st fight, and i am DYING to get in that cage. am i nervous? of course. nervous for my opponent 😔 true story: she called the promoter to ask if i’m ‘really’ a woman. sorry babes, i am. and i get beat up by guys 6 times a week so i can bury little girl dreams 😪 just kidding!! or am i???? the fact is, i’ve worked harder on this than on literally anything else, ever. the fact is, i meditate like 3 hours a day. the fact is, i’ve never hit anyone with my full power. so let’s see how that goes. plus, how much harder can it be to fight some other woman than the creeping realization that nothing in this universe can be truly known? we’ll find out on aug 20.

photo by @roberthamacher
fists by @spitfiregym_berlin

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc

old essay on bodybuilding i wrote for @parole.cc. i was never into bodybuilding per se but years of excessive exercise have built my body nonetheless. i’ve spent countless hours and this essay trying to make sense of my obsession, thinking about how changing my physique has changed my mental state, without ever finding a good answer. there’s something unspeakable about the joy of flesh control. sensations morphed somewhat switching from crossfit to mma, but here i am still 3 years later, cumming all the time.

full thing available on parole.cc